This is What Woke Me Up at 4am

This is what woke me up at 4amThe other day I was startled awake by a powerful dream.  My initial thought was – GEEZ, I just lived through a round of disturbing violent dreams at 1am, WTF?

Then I took a breath knowing that it was 4am, I was awake, and nothing was going to put me back to sleep between that moment and my 5am alarm.   I sank into digesting what I just experienced.

Do you know that feeling when you get whacked upside the head about something that is important at a very primal, fundamental level?

That’s what this dream was.

After all, it’s not every day that Elizabeth Gilbert, queen of all things creative and Big Magic, visits you in the wee hours.  I LOVE that woman, she can visit me any time of day or night.

While the logical details of the dream make no sense (isn’t that usually the case?), what is clear is the feeling

In the dream we were told (there was a workshop-ish type thing happening) to tap into our deepest creative powers and step inside a new world of our making.

Now, I am not the type to be able to magically create stories or worlds or artful things.

I realize anyone who has seen me whip together culinary wonder without a recipe or capture the wonder of a moment with my camera is thinking: What the hell? Isn’t that magical enough?

Well, maybe, but I usually don’t feel that way. Goodness knows we don’t have time get into the depths of the workings of ego, self-judgment, or feelings of meaningfulness.

So, here’s the crazy thing. In this dream, once she gave the command, I was instantaneously swept into a magical medieval world.

WHAT?!

There were knights, horses lush forests, and green expansive hills.  Everyone talked with that touch of British medieval-ness that all those movies have.

And I thought what the hell am I doing here? Where am I? I don’t even like medieval tales. No Games of Thrones for me.  I only liked the Monty Python versions of The Holy Grail because it was Monty Freakin’ Python.

Maybe I stayed in this bewilderment a second or ten years (dream time doesn’t have to make sense). Then the next thing I knew Liz Gilbert is coming into the scene to bring me back to the present moment (and class she was teaching… like going into the hallway to drag in the truant kid).

Dumbfounded I asked – what WAS all that?

She gave me “that smile”- that all-knowing wisdom woman crone, “you now know” smile. It was a vague, fun, annoying type smile that drives left-brain people like me insane because there isn’t some black and white definitive answer attached.

What do I know? What did I miss? Where are the answers?

That’s when a fellow classmate who just happens to be a close colleague of mine I haven’t seen in like 6 years leans in and says, “Paula the point is you can create anything you want. You can step into it as easily and effortlessly and instantaneously as this was.”

And I thought OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH.

And then felt the AHA, the magic, and a little light of epiphany turn on.

Of course then I woke up (Isn’t that always the case in the GOOD dreams?!?! We never wake up before falling in the nightmares, on the other hand).

I spent time journaling about it, reflecting on this vivid experience (because believe me I don’t get many vivid dreams I remember), and continuing to turn it over in my mind and heart.

It is a time of questioning for me personally and this dream, this alternate reality that I can’t even touch or see has been following me around all week.

Sometimes a time of questioning, change, and growth is like that. You need a space to sink in, let go, and not have to do 300 things all at the same time.

If you’ve been pondering big questions like:

Where do I want my business to go next? What do I most want to do? Who do I most want to be in this lifetime?  What might a creative, meaningful tapestry look like in my life and business right here and now in 2018? Why does so much sh*t that I do day in and day out feel broken?

Then a time to step away and explore some “spring cleaning” for your business will deliver you some magic. If you’re interested in taking some time just for you – to explore, make some changes, and grow, sign up here  and I’ll let you know about a very special offer I have coming up.

If you’ve been feeling like the heart of your business could use a little attention and love without the hype, pressure, and judgment, you’re in the right place.  Click here so you can be on the short invite list, no strings attached.

Meanwhile – stay open to magic. Sometimes it will hit you in the most unexpected times and places.

 

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